;i'm sorry i can't be perfect.

if only life could be not that complicated.

somewhere
somehow
somewhat
i've lost myself.

my hearts beats like crazy.
the coming prelims haunts me.

me? i can't take it no more.
can i just wave the white flag, please?

and everyday is a struggle for me.
i try and try to hold my tears back.
but yet i fail.
~~everyday i wash my face with tears~~

show me that i mean as much to you
as you mean to me too.
this time i'm holding onto my pride.
there's some things i can't understand.
and one is, why did i fell for you?

and guilt overwhelms me.

i'm at a loss.

anyone, lead the way out for me, please.

i'm lost.

and i never understood why i fell for you.
but thru it all
i'm still steadfastly in love with you.

how to differentiate right from wrong?

who to trust? who not to trust?

this whole world is filled with hypocrites.

this whole world is filled with liars.

this whole world is simply too difficult to comprehend.

it's starting to seem that everything is based on lies.

i'm tired.

just one more step, and i'll raise my hands to surrender.

~~and every day i wash my face with tears~~

i've never loved anyone the way
i love you.
tell me, do i mean that much to you too?

its like a a thousand knives stabbing into your heart at one go.

i feel so alone.

~~fuck it~~

understanding?

sometimes the people whom you thought would understand you the most,
usually don't.

sometimes the people whom you hope would understand you,
usually don't.

so who are the ones who really understand?

and who are the ones who really care?

i don't believe i've found anyone who understand me yet. nope, not a single soul in this huge world. i'm not trying to be ungrateful. i have lovable friends whom i love dearly and i'm grateful for them. but somehow i can't find a single one who understands me. nobody. no one.

hope is something that fades with the passage of time. i keep hoping and waiting for that phone call that never happens. is this what it is to become out of all this?

i'm disillusioned of everything.

somebody, save me please.

and i know what it is like
to look at a person
and just smile! (:
ilu

i'm jealous. i'm jealous. i'm jealous.

but i can't say it out, can i?

and my tears are threatening to flow once again.

even you think i'm weird.

i'm just another weirdo.

i'm scared.

i'm tired.

i'm lost.

lead the way please.

and numb my pain.

one thing is for sure,
i'm not in love with you
because,
i love you.

shattered.

and now i need you to hold me tight.
make me secure, won't you?

broken and empty.

i'm so alone.

and nobody can ever understand this feeling.

i'm a lost soul.

i hate the person who i've become. or is it the person i am?

hate.
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★ Welcome!

jiahui
23
15nov1990
~~PEPS~~
~~CTSS~~ [♥4d1'06]
NP [♥Psychology & Community Services]
~~NUS~~ [Social Work]
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